Guest Post: Mendy

Image credit: englishwithatwist.com

Image credit: englishwithatwist.com

This is another one of the friends that I have met in the adhesions support group that I am in on Facebook. We are alike (and unusual from the norm) because our adhesions formed mostly from infection instead of from surgery. I hope that you enjoy reading her story. If  you do, please comment and give her a hello.

 

 

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My name is Mendy I’m 51 years old from Cocoa, FL and this is my story:

My life with abdominal adhesions began in 1979 when I gave birth to my son. I was 17 and had an easy pregnancy and delivery, when I went in for my check-up I told my gyno that I thought I had an infection. He said I didn’t. We went back and forth like this for a few years, eight years to be exact, when he finally told me that I didn’t have an infection it was just “gods” way of punishing me for having a baby so young.

I changed gyno doctors and the first thing the new doctor did was clear up the (non-existent) infection which turned out to be PID. Since I was now re-married and wanting to expand my
family we started taking fertility pills because I was not getting pregnant on my own. After two years of taking the pills I found out that I was pregnant. My new husband, myself and my 10 year old son were over the moon with excitement. I was four months pregnant when we had the first ultra sound and found out that something very strange had happened, I was pregnant but a baby never formed it was just a blob and it was known as a blighted ovum and the pregnancy would terminate and a D&C would need to be performed. After a period of mourning and healing time we decided to try again, this time my doctor wanted to do a laparoscopic to find out why the pregnancy did what it did and to see why I was unable to conceive normally. He did a video laparoscopic and found dense multiple adhesions that had all of my reproductive organs twisted and tied and adhered to other organs and my abdominal wall. They said it was called a frozen abdomen. He removed as many as he could safely get to and told me that my chances of ever conceiving or even carrying a baby to term was minimal at best and definitely not recommended. The PID for eight years had done the damage and that my life would never be the same.

For the next nine years I went from gyno to head doctor to gastroenterologist back to gyno in a viscous circle because adhesions don’t show up on any test so therefore it had to be in my head. In the meantime my menstrual cycles were coming very erratically some times I would have my period for months at a time and then they would stop for months at a time and the every day pain was getting worse and worse. I literally crawled into a gyno’s office and went through the story with him and begged him for the hysterectomy because I was told 10 years prior that was the only thing that was going to stop the pain. He refused because I was only 27, I asked him to watch the tape and get back with me. He phoned at 9pm that night and said he was setting me up for emergency hysterectomy the next day. This man was a god send. I don’t know what he did but I came out of the hysterectomy with my belly cut open from hip bone to hip bone and was told that the adhesions were so dense he had to stop the laparoscopy and go in abdominally, he removed adhesions for hours just in order to get to my reproductive system and while he was there he just removed everything so I wouldn’t ever have to have surgery again. He said he put some sort of surgical gel in and tried to coat everything to try and slow the growth of the adhesions down some but no guarantees. I was pain free for 6 glorious years and then had to have an emergency appendectomy. That was in 2003 and the pain has increased over the years until now I am back to living on a mostly liquid diet to try to avoid blockages and further surgeries. Adhesions have destroyed my life, I am no longer able to live a normal life everything I do depends on how bad the pain is that day. I can not plan anything that I can’t excuse myself from at the last moment most of my friends abandoned me years ago because they can’t count on me to be there physically and they definitely don’t understand because I “look fine” so it just doesn’t make any sense to them. I’ve lost my career because of the pain, I could take pain pills and make it through the day but who wants a doped up employee and if I don’t take the pills I am doubled over in pain and crying at my desk so my career ended in 2011.

My hope is that some day they will find a way to stop these dreadful ropes that tie my insides into a ball, if not for me than for future generations so they don’t have to live this way.

Thank you for listening.

 

 

Ok my friends, there you have it. Mendy’s story. Please leave a comment, even if it’s just a hello to let her know you stopped by.

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6 thoughts on “Guest Post: Mendy

  1. I can totally relate to the loosing your friends and your job. You do have your wonderful family though. I thank each and every day for my mother who has now become my care taker at the age of 71 from the Chronic pain I live in daily and awaiting for the day when I can no longer walk from the damage to my sympathetic nerve. Pain is a horrible disease that needs more research. Very interesting blog and I am so sorry to hear what you have been through.

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    • Thank you for your comment. I agree that pain is a horrible disease…in all of it’s manifestations…and needs to be taken more seriously. More research needs to be done and awareness campaigns need to be launched so that others better understand what we go through. I am so sorry that you have to know what it is like.

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  2. I promise that I will come back and read a little more closely (as I am so tired and ready to sleep now) but I do so appreciate that your guest blogger had a photo of herself. Mendy, if you’re reading the comments, thank you, I appreciate a face to go with text. Again, I shall stop by again to read this when my brain is not so much tired slush.

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  3. Ah. Now I’ve had a chance to read through things better. Although my health issues are different, I definitely understand the “but you don’t look sick” and the “you look fine” mindset that people can have, and of course the frustration with health care workers (doctors, nurses, etc.) who have a poor bedside manner and who put more precedence on what their experiences are compared to what I tell them I am experiencing.

    Thanks again. I think it’s definitely worth it to fight for professionals that will treat us with the respect, dignity, and care we deserve!

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